The Universe Listens In Strange Ways

Well hello! Here I am again. I’d been wondering what I’d write about next & had been thinking on it & the the universe decided to give the answer but not one I was ever expecting. I knew that you have to be careful & be very specific because the universe listens in strange ways & then answers in like. 

I’ve been having some new health problems over the past year or so & had been being sent for tests of all kinds. Had a colonoscopy & endoscopy & those tests came back fine for the most part. So I thinking Geeze, there’s a butt load(no pun intended) of money wasted. Blood tests all came back good(well except for cholesterol & that’s always been high) so more money down the drain. Ok, side note here, I don’t have health insurance so I have to pay out of pocket for everything. Anyhow, I went to see my neurologist for my 3 month check in about spinal problems & mentioned that I’d been having a problems with vertigo, well he does all these other tests & then tells me he wants me to go have MRI of my brain. Ooooookay then. Well make appointment for that & why not? Just more more being pissed away, they never find anything on these damn test anyway. So managed to get an appointment for within days of neurologist wanting it. Really should mention here that I am somewhat claustrophobic & if you’ve ever had an MRI you might be able to understand this. I timed it out so that the 7.5mg of Valium I took kicked in just before I had to get in machine. That stuff works great! I was able to tune out all the really loud noises & the rhythm that made it through put the Ramones I Wanna Be Sedated in my head. Not a bad way to spend 20 minutes.

So anyway, a week later I get call from neurologist office telling me that there’s a lesion on my pituitary gland & Doctor wanted me to get another MRI, this time of pituitary itself. So first thing I did was Google lesions on pituitary, all news on that front was good, very rarely cancerous or malignant & easily treatable. So get the from the imaging place & got another quick appointment. So different day, same song, Valium on board again & more Ramones(Blitzkrieg Bop this time) running through head. So second MRI done & back to waiting to hear from neuro doctor telling me I need to see endocrinologist to take care of this. Great, another doctor to add to my list! Well, 3 days later get call from neuro doctor’s office, “Mrs. Melcher it’s not what we thought it was. It’s a tumor/lesion that is surrounding your pituitary gland & is pressing on your optic nerve. We need you to go to eye doctor & get visual field test & you’ll be getting call from Dr.—–, a neurosurgeon to set up appointment.” Wait a minute! Huh?! What?! Did you just say BRAIN TUMOR & NEUROSURGEON? As in someone’s going to cut into my brain! Wait! Wait! Wait! Something’s actually growing in my brain that doesn’t belong there?!!! WHOA! Did you say optic nerve?! Those are my eyes you’re talking about here! Okay, okay, don’t freak out yet! You have to get eye appointment on short notice! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so managed to get appointment for that afternoon. What fun that was.(Please take note of very heavy sarcasm there) Turns out I do have field of vision loss & one of my pupils dilates instead of contracting with light. Well that’s not good!

Now been waiting almost 2 weeks to hear from neurosurgeon’s office to set up appointment! Do these people not realize how stressful this is?! So I put in a call to the P.A. at neurologist office & first thing she says to me is”Never saw this coming”, that is understatement of all time. Then tells me it is normal for it to take this long to hear from the surgeon, they have this whole routine they have. Well isn’t that just ducky. So been trying my best not to freak out, not that easy when you start getting the weird headaches you’ve been trying to ignore but now know they’re being caused by brain tumor, but while I’ve been waiting it dawned on me that the universe was saying “Here ya go, I’ve given you something to write about” Gee, thanks. 

So my point, yes I’m finally there!, is looks like I’ll be here a bit more often writing about what’s going on with this whole brain tumor business. I’ve been trying to find humor in it all, my friend Linda suggested we name it & call it George, so it’s name is now George. 

Well that’s it for now, I’m going back to trying not to & not get to stress out over not hearing from surgeon.Thanks for stopping by & apparently I’ll be back soon.

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About francinesplace

I like to read, draw & write. I tend to write the way I talk. I wander a bit & usually get to my point. Some times get lost & never know where I'll wind up! Come along for the ride.
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